Well it started off pretty well after my last SPM paper. I was stripping (control yourself ladies) my way to the toilet to have a quick bath after reaching home. I thought that i had done pretty well in the last paper and that just added to the joy. The hard part that time was to decide which one of my many many post-spm plans should be done first.
Then there came that call from mum, ordering me to pack up all my stuff and be ready in 15 minutes. We were going to have a 3 days 2 nights stay at my grandfather's place. He had passed away the day before. She came home 45 minutes later, pretty much expected though.
On the way there, the initial joy had vanished and all i could think of was 'what a way to start my hols' .it was mostly tears there but none from me. I only lamented on how my knees were turning purple from all the kneeling. At time we had to kneel,bow, and get up and repeat the process for 30 minutes which seemed like forever.
My grandad and i hardly shared any fond memories. To me, he was always cold and fierce. But this morning when we were paying our last respects, a flashback struck me. It was my grandad putting his hand on my head while praising me for being a good boy. Now he is.. gone. My eyes turned warm and moist. Sadness was within me since then until now.
Right now, i dont have the holiday mood nomore. As if this break meant nothing at all. Its a mixture of feelings and i got lost between them. Therefore the blog is revived. ( lol it was dead after the first posts) to seek hope and to express my feelings. Hopefully things will be going up the curve from here.
I am sorry if i didnt show more love and affection to you, rest in peace, without worries, gong gong.
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